Breakthrough

I had one of those days were everything seemed to click.

I've been at my current job now for four months, almost to the day... and although people have been nice and it is a good job, I've never really felt like I've fit in there. I'm either 20 or 30 years younger, or just in a different place in life. So, I go in, do the work and then leave. I hate that.

I don't know what it is, I usually make friends and form relationships very fast in new places but I've felt like I needed to keep a guard up.

Well, today felt like huge turning point... im not sure what it was; maybe I'm the one growing or opening up more. Whatever is it, I actually felt an enormous amount of support behind me. I felt apart of the team and I had people sticking up for me and helping me.  to me, thats huge. All I want is to know I'm not alone.

I think this turning point is not only in my job but in my daily life. I am handling med school much better this semester and I am learning how to cope and accept the things that are happening. Good or bad.

** A few weeks ago I was talking to a friend about how I hate that I can have a perfectly good day and the minute Josh gets in the door, all I do is rant and rave about the one bad thing that happened. I think being secure and happy about whats going on in your life makes the good days "more real" - knowing that you deserved this day. Being comfortable sharing happy details with people that care about you and not just the annoying crappy stuff- even though they are there to listen to that stuff too. [Make Sense?]**

I left work feeling empowered and proud of what I had accomplished today.

This new found light has inspired even more to keep working out. On a quick side note, I have sucked at going to the gym and working out. I don't know why, I want to get into shape, I have all the tools at my finger tips but I. DON'T. DO .IT.  -- I even feel sick with guilt when I don't... But, I need to buck up and just do it. I work my butt at work all day, what's another hour at the gym.
[I mean really, come on felicia!]


Goodbye for now,
Felicia